Showing posts with label and the law won. Show all posts
Showing posts with label and the law won. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

As My Drinking Binge Continues, I Stumble onto…

Parental discretion advised…

anal sex was akin to “shoving a straw up your nose to drink.”

Hmm

Hey, the professor may have a point—not that I know anything about that. But you know what really, really surprises me? It’s that shoving a straw up your nose to drink is illegal in Singapore.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

…and Then the Royal Canadian Mounted Police Arrested Him…

Yesterday, Canada granted citizenship to some people who had lost their Canadian citizenship or never had had it in the first place. Watch this video clip, then get the details here, courtesy of Citizenship and Immigration Canada*. My heartfelt congratulations to the law-abiding readers of this blog who are the beneficiaries of this boon. After all, it’s not for nothing that they say, Canada is the United States…without the crime.

But speaking of crime, if you are a criminal and are living in or traveling to a country that has an extradition treaty with Canada, watch out. According to Article 4777.1 of the Canadian Criminal Code, “[e]very person who commits an act or omission that, if it occurred in Canada, would be an offence under a federal law, within the meaning of section 2 of the Oceans Act, is deemed to have committed that act or omission in Canada if it is an act or omission…that is committed outside the territory of any state by a Canadian citizen.” And don’t think you can get out of it by renouncing your new-found Canadian citizenship. The website warns you that to be able to deny your new Mother Country’s gift, “you must…not be a threat to Canada’s security or part of a pattern of criminal activity”.

Now aren’t you glad you read this blog?

* In an apparent fit of attempted coolness, Canada took the Ministry out of all their ministries and renamed them XXX Canada.

Defendant Tells Judge Where to Blow His Toke

A 20 year-old former tobishoku—a skilled construction worker somewhat similar to a “spiderman”—was brought before the Gifu District Court on charges of theft. The defendant was alleged to have gone on a two-day shoplifting spree, taking 229 manga comic books worth roughly 110,000 yen in order to repay loans and finance a marijuana habit. When the judge* asked, “Do you understand that marijuana is bad for your health?”, the defendant replied, “I don’t think it’s bad for my health. I did research on the Internet, and it said that marijuana was less harmful than tobacco and alcohol.” The judge responded to this in a voice that was audible to the three people who had come to watch the proceedings, “You’re being deceived, because you’re a fool (ばか).”

Leaving aside for the moment the undeniable fact that the defendant was a fool for challenging the judge, it is safe to say on the basis of 100% hearsay evidence—that marijuana is less harmful to the health of the user than tobacco and less harmful to everyone than alcohol—you rarely if ever hear of a marijuana-fueled shooting binge or a driver high on marijuana piling into a row of schoolchildren. I suspect that the Japanese media is aware that the defendant’s logic cannot be totally denied. It’s a debate that will start in earnest here in future years, as the U.S. and Western Europe gradually move towards further decriminalization. But I digress.

Asahi, Yomiuri, and Sankei have seized on this incident, considering the matter noteworthy enough to post on their websites, unusual treatment for such a trivial case not involving policemen, prosecutors, judges, other public servants, and educators. For the moment, they appear to be focusing on the fact that the judge called the defendant a fool, presumably a breach of decorum and detrimental to the court’s dignity. As evidence of this interpretation, unusually for a criminal case, the name of the defendant—not a minor—(as well as the judge’s) have been withheld from publication.

However, if the language went beyond the narrow, acceptable boundaries of behavior that the Japanese media demands of the judiciary, the sentiment itself was not unexpected, coming as it did in a criminal case. Various memoirs by ex-judges as well as more impersonal reports indicate that the judiciary shares a common belief that the role of the courts goes beyond upholding the law itself to restoring and improving the moral rectitude of society at large and specifically criminal miscreants. Thus, it is not that unusual for judges during the course of proceedings to admonish, chastise, or even commiserate with defendants for their admitted behavior and/or their lack/expressions/of remorse. This behavior reaches its peak in a guilty verdict and the concomitant sentencing, where the judge apparently feels a professional obligation to offer what amounts to a lengthy sermon to the understandably pensive defender. The verdict itself is typically studded with judgmental, exhortatory, and emotive language, such as “coldblooded” and “utterly depraved” nature of the crime and the “utterly depraved”, as well as the ubiquitous reference to the defendant’s sense of remorse or lack thereof.

It is important in this context to note that the degree of remorse expressed by the defendant through the course of the proceedings can materially and explicitly affect the severity of the eventual sentence. Thus, the comportment of the defendant with regard to this point may be more the outcome of self-interested calculations than any genuine change of heart. This process is not limited to the judiciary, but extends to the prosecutors—remember the Public Prosecutors Office’s near unlimited discretion over the decision to pursue a case in court—and the police, where intimations of severe sentences have apparently led on rare occasions to suspects confessing to crimes that they did not actually commit.

All the more astounding then, to find the defendant in this case ambushing the judge on what was only a little more than a rhetorical question (as a clever schoolboy would have ambushed his schoolmaster upon being told that he would suffer brain damage if he continued to indulge himself). His rash action certainly did not help him in the criminal proceedings, but it did get him case (if not his name) in the papers.

* In Japan, there are no juries. Minor cases are presided over by a single judge; more serious cases require three judges, with a majority required to convict. Starting this July, laypersons will join the judge of judges in sitting on cases and deciding the verdict and sentence if required.

Monday, April 06, 2009

Where’s Nikai?

Toshihiro Nikai, the LDP faction leader and current METI Minister, had been looking like the yin to Ichiro Ozawa’s yang, Chip to Ozawa’s Dale, in the Nishimatsu scandal. But he seems to have dropped out of the media’s sights, even before the weekend frenzy over the North Korean “satellite” launch. (Incidentally, I think that the press coverage was disproportionate to the public’s interest n the subject. Life mostly went on, unless a reporter stuck a mike in front of your face. This contrasts strongly with the abduction issues, where I believe that the public and the media did more feeding on each other.) His story appears to have been relegated to the back pages of a few tabloids. The Nikai side ain’t talkin’; in return, the Public Prosecutors Office has stopped leaking. Or have I missed something?

If someone in his camp is not indicted, it’ll fuel a lot of conspiracy theories. The PPO will have a lot of ‘splainin’ to do. Just sayin’.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Elliot Spitzer

I had dinner last night with several people from New York working closely with the financial industry. You know what? Eliot Spitzer must be the most hated person on Wall Street.

Silliness aside, count on Sudhir Venkatesh to deliver the goods. Is there such a job category as investigative economist? Compared to Mr. Venkatesh, Stepehn Levitt is just a guy who can ask clever questions and do regression analysis.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Have a Beef with Sidewalk Cyclists? That’s Easy, OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

Not quite. But almost as satisfying, you can make an on-the-spot, citizen’s arrest. You see, under Japanese traffic law, a bicycle is considered a (light) vehicle and as such may not be ridden on the sidewalk. So the next time you’re on the sidewalk and a bicycle rider comes bearing down on you, ringing his bell to get you out of the way, you can grab the guy by the wrist, wrestle him down to the ground, and hold him there until the cops arrive. Yes, the provision is rarely enforced on its own, but for the police, it is sufficient grounds for stopping and questioning you about yourself and the bike before letting you off with an admonishment. Among other things, this means that unban cyclists in Japan are advised to have their IDs on hand. Specifically, gaijin sidewalk cyclists caught out without their IDs can be charged on that infraction, much in the way that NBA basketball players are caught with driving offenses and charged with drug and illegal arms possession.

The citizen’s arrest can be useful on other occasions as well. For example, did you know that under the Misdemeanors Act, Article 1, item 20, you can be detained for up to 29 days or fined between 1000 and 9,999 yen if you “wantonly expose buttocks, thighs and other parts of the body at a place where they would be visible to the public eye in a manner that raises a feeling of disgust among the public”? So, the next time you happen to wander upon the beach and you come across, say, Hoshino Aki in a thong bikini, you can grab the girl by… whatever you can get your hands on, wrestle her down to the ground, and hold her there until the cops arrive. But remember, it’s the “feeling of disgust” that counts. So, if you’re a gaijin, here are the magic Japanese words, rendered phonetically, to keep repeating out loud while you have Hoshino Aki pinned underneath you, just to be sure that the cops don’t haul off the wrong person:

Wa-ta-shi wa ken-o no jō wo mo-yo-o-shi-te-i-ru
(A feeling of disgust has arisen in me).

Trust me.