“Islamic
fundamentalists” have largely disappeared from most of mainline Western media
discourse, only to be replaced by “Islamists.” A search on the online Free Dictionary takes you to “Islamism,”
whose primary definition is given as the following: “An Islamic revivalist
movement, often characterized by moral conservatism, literalism, and the
attempt to implement Islamic values in all spheres of life.” In practice, “Islamist”
usually appears in a negative context, such as terrorists—Islamist terrorists—and
their supporters actual and potential, Wahhabis (whose influence on the former is
seen as definitive), and opponents of liberal forces in Islamic societies. Where
they are seen in a positive light by the Western media, they are usually
qualified with the word “moderate.” By comparison, a search for “Christianist”
in the Free Dictionary redirects to
Christianism, whose primary definition is: “TheChristian religion. Christian movements characterized by moral conservatism,
literalism, and the attempt to implement Christian values in all spheres of
life.” Examples: evangelicals, conservative Catholics.
By this definition, Christians who bomb abortion clinics and
assault people working there should be called “Christianist terrorists.” I have
determined that football players and other athletes who attribute any great
fortune of theirs (but not misfortunes, Heaven forbid) to “God” are not
necessarily Christians, given their typical lifestyle outside of their chosen
sport. Instead, I believe that they should be Christian shamanists. Indeed,
this is not limited to the playing field. Given the frequent invocation of “God”
(and we all know which god is being invoked here) in political discourse,
including the Pledge of Allegiance and most official pronouncements by the
President, the United States can rightly be called the Christian shamanist
nation.
Next question: Jewists.
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